![sanam sindhi sanam sindhi](https://64.media.tumblr.com/fca0ae079935ba150c585d900af0d021/tumblr_o87cs8WqrY1rr7pe9o1_1280.jpg)
But there’s so much more space now to pursue the things you want to do. How do you even survive doing one job? It’s not viable in 2018 no one pays you enough to make ends meet. At the time, I worked at a plant store and made like $10 an hour. In Instagram culture, you have to be doing five million things. People don’t realize that when Rihanna found me, my 10,000 followers felt like a huge deal.
![sanam sindhi sanam sindhi](https://pakistani.pk/uploads/reviews/photos/original/88/af/9a/Sanam20Baloch2012-81-1440510856.jpg)
SS: Instagram is a whole mess but yes it did change my life. But there have been times where I’ve tried to do that for people and they take it too far.ĪS: Do you think Instagram had a bigger impact on your life than it has for most people? Motherfuckers want me to be their therapist, their life coach, their best friend, and I’m not available for that. I get hella messages every day, people who feel entitled to my time and energy. People think that I’m very cold and inaccessible, but really I’m a very generous giving person, and I have to close that part of myself off in order to not be taken advantage of.Įven on Instagram, I give people an inch and they take a mile. It looks like a lot of drugs and being miserable.' But good things started happening because I was valuing myself for the first time in my life and putting myself first. This is what I expected coming out of my recent relationship, I thought, 'I’ve been here before and I know what it looks like. My marriage was very abusive and I really fucking fell apart, I had no sense of myself, and was hella addicted to Xanax. I got out of that relationship and that was the first time in my life I truly enjoyed being alone, and came to know myself, and saw myself for the first time. My last relationship was super abusive and fucked up. I spent my entire adult life in serious relationships. I don’t want anything more than that right now. I have a lot of good sex with a lot of people. SS: I don’t have the emotional capacity to accommodate people being in love with me.
![sanam sindhi sanam sindhi](https://c.saavncdn.com/693/Zaiba-Sanam-Bayah-Mani-Dilrubah-Vol-3-Sindhi-2015-20210309070455-500x500.jpg)
And I prefer vape pens, which are not as cute as holding a joint.ĪS: What’s going on in your life right now? I know Wednesday is a chill day at the office, so I can smoke a little bit of weed on a Tuesday before I go to bed. Tuesdays and Saturdays are my big weed days, because Sunday is a chill day for me, so I can smoke a shit ton of weed on a Saturday night. When I lived in Seattle I started smoking weed again and I was like, ‘Oh shit, I love weed!’ Because I wasn’t smoking mids and street weed anymore. It always gave me mad anxiety and made me super nauseous. Sanam Sindhi: I’ve been smoking since I was 14. Alyssa Shapiro: What’s your relationship with weed?